Making a new book of tree rules

Okay, Redwood and I had a quarrel about how old -q is in original oaks. We both were using ultimate books of tree rules. We were using different editions, of course. The editions we used said the opposite of each other. I figured that quarrel was going on too long. I also figured that both editions were incorrect. So let's create a new tree almanac with our own rules.

First rule: We use human years. Humans are the dominant species on Earth, so why don't we use their stuff to our advantage. They won't even know! It's too confusing to have our own numbers which have been changed over the long years.

.

First of all, yeah, they're dying. They're dying for a very good reason, though. Second of all, it wouldn't be a very good idea to put secret spy missiles with all of our waste water and oxygen, now would it.

Also, we're making rules, not false statements. What should a fashionable tree house (not compound word) look like? What are our enemies? What are our friends?

Rule 2 (v. 2.0.0)

We are not friends with squirrels. They eat our acorns. OW!

Rule 3: If you are caught by a suspicious human, kill yourself with an implosion pill. We can't have our secret base found.

Can I use an implosion pill Mr. Sapling? No reason *averts gaze*